March 17, 2011

Eloy [Vargas], Why Hast Thou Forsaken Me?!

The calls started coming in December.

“Are you doing your coin-flip bracket this year? I can’t wait!” – Gene, Knoxville TN

“Who do the coins like this year?! OMG I LOVED the coin-flip bracket!!!” – Andrea, Chicago IL

“You MUST do the coin-flip bracket again this year! Also, you are very attractive and charming.” – Cecilia, Climax PA

Well, loyal acolytes, Scotticus hears your cries. The man who put the "gnostic” in “prognostication” has once again obliterated the limits of human thumb muscles, flipped nearly 1000 coins, and brought you the March Madness equivalent of a donkey-kick to the gonads:

North Carolina brings home banner number six.

Last year, my system picked Duke. This year: those filthy Tar Heels. I can only assume next year’s bracket will find a way to crown either Kim Jong Il or Michael Bay as NCAA champs.

I’m going to go vomit for the next three weeks. Here’s your stupid bracket:

Go here to see the details of the system I used, and here to see how chance is way smarter than you.


  1. Darrell, brother in law no moreMarch 17, 2011 11:43 AM

    I'm not sure which one hurts worse North Carolina or Florida. Scotticus how could you, HOW COULD YOU?

  2. Please say it ain't true in the Southwest!!

  3. Yep, the dirty Cards and their line beards are destined for the Final Four. Cold comfort watching them beat Kansas I suppose.

  4. My bracket may have caught up with the coin-toss version. Will have to check closely tonight to be sure.